This Blog

Deklan is now almost TWO WEEKS OLD! YIKES! (This picture was taken the first time Jonny's mom got to hold him)

 I haven't been getting much sleep these days (who knew! :)  It has been so fun to get to know Deklan and his little personality these past few weeks. He makes me smile every time I snuggle him. However this blog was initially intended for my journey to pregnancy and the difficult times I have had with infertility. I want to keep it that way and not overwhelm anyone with obsessive pictures of my son. SO- I will be adding LOTS of updates of Deklan on my family blog. This blog will continue to me outlet. I still struggle. I still need this community of amazing support I have found. I am still reading all of your journey's as well. So for those of you who would like to see my family updates you can HERE. For those who aren't too interested in that- I am still going to be on this blog. 

Jonny and I want to have a big family. I have no idea if my body will let me do this again but we want to try. We won't be using any form of birth control- I have NO idea if I will be able to get pregnant on my own this time around. If I had my ideal situation- it would be to have some time with Deklan before getting pregnant again -however I would be THRILLED if I could get pregnant right away obviously as well. I am scared to death to "try" again. If it doesn't work we have seven frozen babies waiting to be defrosted. That also scares me. What the heck would I do with seven frozen babies if I CAN get pregnant on my own?!!! Goodness they are already embryo's. They are Jonny and MY babies just waiting to be implanted. Could I ever have the heart to throw them away?? Could I possibly give them away knowing that MY babies are somewhere out there with another family? All things I will have to deal with in the future. For now- I will snuggle Deklan and enjoy the moment. :)